Heavy Heart

Sometimes I feel as though we go through our days never really understanding why we do what we do. It seems as though days can be routine, and never respected in its full. Taking it for granted would be the proper way to explain it.

Living this lifestyle has taught me so much. It has taught me that there is a line to be drawn when it comes to respect. It has taught me that some days seem longer than others, but everyday that you wake up as a whole family is a great day. It has taught me that nothing is a sure thing, and sometimes in life you truly do not get a choice of which direction your life is going in. One thing though that I have learned in this journey is that there are many days that I am filled with a heavy heart, and that is okay.

It seems as though death is all around us, military or civilian. Sadness is something that is inevitable, even if we think we are made of stone. The hard part for me is watching those that only see sadness in their own lives. I understand that we all have troubles, and I by no means am saying that we should not feel sorrow for ourselves. It is the lack of feeling towards others that weighs heavy on my heart.

One thing that is a sad routine is the routine of loss. In the almost three short years that I have lived on an Army post, there have been many funerals. Another routine that I have noticed is that there are spouses that show no remorse for the families of the ones lost.

It may be the time of year, with holidays and celebrations that are coming up. I just feel as though these are the times that we need to truly come together and show those that have been through those times, that we all pray never happens to us, that they are not alone. Showing compassion for others is something that I wish everyone would demonstrate. I feel as though the ones that have made it through this life of not-knowing forget that others were lost in the road to freedom.

Never take for granted what you have, and never forget that others may not be so lucky. Take extra time out of your day to show others that you have a heavy heart. Let others know that it is okay to feel sad for one another; because it is showing an understanding that you realize in the midst of love there is loss, and sometimes we are the ones that need to show compassion for the ones that have lost. We are in this together, life as a whole, so do not hesitate to help your neighbor. We should not be afraid to show emotions for others sadness. Open our hearts and our ears to the stories of those around us, and to the questions that others have. Teaching is a skill, but learning is a gift.

I hope that you find yourself in the position of showing a heavy heart for others, and not having a heavy heart these holidays for sorrow of your own. If you do though, do not forget that you are not alone, and with tough times comes lessons learned, maybe not just for you but for those willing to open their heart to your sadness also.

Let us not forget...

I think we all tend to take the holidays for granted sometimes. Sometimes I think that we truly miss the true meaning of why we have these celebrations in the first place.

For me this began a few years ago. Even with children, I just felt as though the holidays were such a selfish time of year. A time that people wanted to use as a chance to get the gifts that they have wanted; and a reason to complain about the friends and family that we really do not want to be around. Trust me; we all have at least one in our lives.

Last year was different though. With my husband being deployed the holidays were up to me to make sure that the children were not affected too much by his absence. We were blessed enough to have my parents for Thanksgiving, but Christmas was to be spent as just a family.

One of the biggest lessons that I took away from spending this past year a world apart from my husband, is that we truly got away from the real meaning. It is, anyways Christ's birthday right? That was the problem that I had found myself in, although I made it clear that this was a celebration of his life, my children had no idea who 'he' was. And what his word was truly about.

It is difficult with children of such young ages, and mine had never really been involved in a church setting long enough to really get it. So, it was my goal to make sure that they truly understood. I started by decorating the house in a festive, and inviting way. I then expressed over and over what Christmas really stood for. Part of understanding the celebration part was also understanding that although they receive gifts from Santa, that there are still children that are not so fortunate. So taking the understanding of the meaning of Christmas, my next goal was to instill in my children that Christ wants us to be kind and thoughtful of those around us.

My children have been taught that if they want Santa to bless them with gifts this special time of year, we must thank Christ in a way of helping others. They are to donate toys that they are no longer using, and some that just make too much noise. (They need new homes also.) This also includes their old clothes and winter apparel. They are to give away with the understanding that some families are not as lucky as ours. And we should be thankful for all that we have.

In the name of Christ’s birth we should help to bless others also. I hope that my children understand that with the many celebrations that they are present for, and the many gifts that they are surprised by on Christmas morning that they have helped do their part to help bless others.

This year though, I feel as though we have been blessed in so many more ways. My husband has returned safely and will be with us to celebrate this very special day. We were whole this year when my children donated boxes of toys to families that needed them. And we will be whole to celebrate a new year, knowing that he is home to stay for a while.

Let us not forget the true meaning of this wonderful time of year. Let us not forget that although we may not enjoy some of the extra things that come with it, we are alive and are blessed enough to have family and friends around to spend time with. Let us not forget that some will be one parent short this year. Let us not forget that some will spend this special day as the first without and spouse and/or parent for the rest of their lives. Let us not forget to be kind to those around us, even if we feel as though they may not truly deserve it. Let us not forget the true meaning of this time of year, and carry in his name the kindness that he would hope upon us all.

Lastly have a very Merry Christmas. And for those of you who do not celebrate this special time of year, have a wonderful and safe holiday season, for it is a great time to show your appreciation for others around you.